Inner Music The Words Make
You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you. ~Ray Bradbury
I Will Be Brave, I Will Not Let Anything Take Away Standing in Front of Me (Every Breath Every Hour) 
24th-Nov-2011 04:18 pm
Title: I Will Be Brave, I Will Not Let Anything Take Away Standing in Front of Me (Every Breath, Every Hour Has Come To This)
Author: freeiheitpisarz
Rating: R
Characters/Pairings: Kurt Hummel, Finn Hudson, Santana Lopez, Burt Hummel, Carole Hudson, New Directions, ensemble. Kinn slash, various canon and non-canon pairings, mentions of past Finchel.  
Genre: Angst/Hurt/Comfort
Warning: Mild violence, mild coarse language
Spoilers: Blanket season three spoilers, up to at least 3x05
Disclaimer: I do now own Glee, nor do I own Christina Perri’s ‘A Thousand Years,’ from which the title comes from.
Word Count: 1,100 this chapter
Author’s Note: This is inspired by a prompt on the Glee Angst Meme, with a bit of a twist.
Summary: When Santana discovers a secret relationship between Kurt and Finn, she uses the knowledge to help Sue’s campaign in order to win back HIBC status at McKinley. Unfortunately her actions have disastrous consequences.
*
Kurt is still unsure how Santana found out. He’s still unsure how it went from everyone being unknowing, to Santana casting glances at him, glances at Finn. He doesn’t know when those calculating looks began to be aimed at him, when she stopped focusing on bring down the Glee club, or ruining other people’s relationships. Now he and Finn were the focus of her malicious thoughts, somehow.
*
The picture on the television screen is blurred, fuzzy, but it’s still possible to make out the two people in the photo on the screen are Finn and Kurt and it’s not hard to make out the two aren’t doing something that’s exactly brotherly. Kurt gasps quietly and covers his mouth with his hand, looking over at Finn. Finn is pale and not moving, staring at the television screen.

“Boys…” Carole trails off, unsure what to say. She and Burt look as shocked as they do at seeing Finn and Kurt’s picture being plastered all over Sue’s Corner.

Kurt looks over at his dad to see his reaction, only for Burt to stand and leave the room. After a moment, Kurt follows him, intent on finding out what his dad is thinking. Burt doesn’t say anything when Kurt follows him into the room and Kurt clears his throat, unsure what to say. Finally he opens his mouth only for Burt to beat him to it.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Burt finally asks, quietly.

Kurt doesn’t really want to tell his dad the truth. That they were scared. That they thought there was a chance Burt and Carole might stop them from being together, that Burt and Carole might break up. There were a lot of reasons to hide it and nearly none as to why they should share it.

“I’m sorry,” Kurt finally settles on. “We just- We didn’t want anyone to know, especially while we were still figuring it out.” Especially when Kurt still wasn’t sure Finn was serious.

“Everyone knows now,” Burt says, pointing out the obvious. “It’s going to be hard, especially for Finn,” Another obvious face, one Kurt was trying to overlook at the moment. You should probably lay low for a while.” Kurt stays silent. He knows what Burt means. He knows that he’ll have to tone it down, tone down his behaviour, tone down his relationship with Finn.

“I know dad.” Kurt says quietly and something in his tone must alert his dad, because the next moment his dad is engulfing him in a hug. Kurt buries his head in his dad’s shirt, breathing in his father’s scent and clutching the back of his dad’s shirt.
“I’m sorry this happened kiddo,” Burt said. “I’m sorry you and Finn and Carole have been pulled into this mess.”

Burt squeezes Kurt again and Kurt knows the moments over. He gives his dad a tired smile before retreating back into the house where he finds Carole sitting on the lounge. She looks up at him before giving him a small smile. He approaches her and she reaches out and squeezes his hand before glancing at the bedroom door, which is now pulled shut.  Understanding what she meant, Kurt squeezs her hand back before making his way to the bedroom.

Hesitating, Kurt knocks softly on the door. When Finn doesn’t reply, Kurt opens the door regardless and sticks his head in to see what Finn was doing. The larger boy was lying on his back on his bed, arms by his side, staring at the ceiling.

“Finn?” Kurt steps closer to the bed, hesitating before perching himself on the edge of the bed. “I’m sorry Finn,” he says quietly, looking down at the floor, his hands resting on his knees. “I never meant for you to be outed like this or for anyone to find out about our relationships like this,” he glances over at Finn, reaching out and resting his hand on top of Finn’s. “And I can’t say I know exactly what you’re going through right now, but I’m here if you want to talk.”

“How could she do this?” Finn finally asks a few moments later, not looking at Kurt. “Santana’s in Glee club, she’s supposed to be part of our family. How could she do that to us on national TV?”

Kurt has no answer for Finn. He doesn’t know why Santana did what she did, what her motives were. He has nothing to comfort Finn with so he stays silent. After a moment he apologises again. “It’s my fault, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have-” For the second time in recent times, Kurt finds himself being pulled into a hug and he chokes back a sob as he wraps his arms around Finn’s waist. “I’m sorry.” He repeats, his voice stuffy.

“It’s not your fault,” Finn says, rubbing Kurt’s back. “Could we… Could we say she made it up? Pretend we have no idea what she’s talking about?” Kurt tenses. He doesn’t know how he feels about Finn publically denying their relationship like that. He understands Finn needs to be ready for this, but every denial is practically like a stab in the heart to Kurt. “No,” Finn says after a moment, with such force Kurt looks up at his face and sees Finn is staring at him with a determined look on his face. “No, we’re going to go into school tomorrow holding hands.”

“We really shouldn’t Finn,” Kurt says softly, aware of what his father has just told him. “We don’t want to make it worse.”
Finn’s shoulders slump, a sad look on his face. “I want to make this better. I said I always had your back and now… Now there’s nothing I can do to make this better. I hate it. I hate that you’re unhappy.”

“I’m more worried about you,” Kurt says. “Everyone already knew I was gay. Sure, they’re going to hate me for turning their football captain gay, but they already hate me. It’s you that’s going to pay the price,” he glances up at Finn. “I’m sorry that this is all going to be on you. I’m sorry this is going to make it worse for you.”

“Let’s cuddle,” Finn says suddenly, tugging Kurt down to lie beside him. Kurt does this and cuddles up against Finn, wrapping his arms and leg around Finn. “Maybe nobody watched the show?” Finn suggests, but Kurt can hear over the hope in Finn’s voice that Finn knows it’s very unlikely. Finn doesn’t say anything after that and eventually the two of them fall asleep curled up together on Finn’s bed.
 
Comments 
26th-Nov-2011 05:29 pm (UTC)
I always have this headcanon that once Finn "outed" Santana that it would have run parallel to his feelings for Kurt. Of course, that would make too much sense and that RIB can't logistically follow through on anything.

Thanks for posting...I'm onto part two.
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